When we were in that week of limbo between blood test and diagnosis, I was on the last three days of my maternity leave. Dates may be helpful here so I don’t have to add irrelevant details. Wednesday, October 1st was our initial meeting with Dr. Angle. Friday, October 3rd was my phone call to Emily. Monday, October 6th was my first day back to work after maternity leave. Now you have a sense of things…
So, I was coming back fulltime at a new school this year. I would be a Reading Recovery teacher and reading specialist at Oakton School. I had just found out that I would be at a new school in August and Oakton didn’t have an office ready for me yet. Flash forward to the week before I would go back to work and it is easy to see why I had not yet set up my office or at all prepared to return to work. I’m getting to the point here, I promise. Nicole knew all of the hushed details of what was going on with TJ and she gathered all of my things from King Lab School and moved me into my new office at Oakton. She unpacked my boxes, carefully set up my desk just the way I like it, and she put each book on my shelf where I had them in my last office. She got me ready.
Monday, my first day back to work, I was in tears having to leave my little guy. I would have cried anyway that day, but you can imagine it is even worse when you are in the kind of limbo we were in. Nicki met me for lunch. She came over on Tuesday and helped me write my observation summaries of my new students. And she was the first to call Wednesday, when we got the diagnosis.
Since the diagnosis (which I will share with you in a later post) Nicole has prepared meals for us, she has helped me with my leave of absence paperwork, and she has driven down to the city a hundred times. But again, I need to get to the point.
Nicole set up this website for us. My colleagues in Evanston wanted to help, just like everyone else we knew. They were offering meals and sick days, babysitting and cleaning services, so Nicole who is an actual Type A personality set order to the chaos. Unfortunately, our school district does not allow the transfer of sick days between teachers. This is very unfortunate and none of us knew it. So, Nicole would not take no for an answer. She met with the superintendent to see what could be done. He suggested doing a fundraiser. Hence the fundraiser website.
I was leery of asking for help in this way. Frankly, I was a bit embarrassed and had turned down the idea three times before agreeing to it. Again, it was God who gave me the answer. I was praying please God, let me stay home with TJ. I know we can’t afford it, but how can I leave him? Please, I begged, please. Each time, He answered. I just wasn’t listening. Each time I prayed, someone suggested a fundraiser. Each time someone suggested a fundraiser, I said, oh no, not that.
But this time, I listened, I thought, God is answering, He will provide, you just need to do it His way. So, I asked Nicki to help, and of course she Nickied it and we have the site you’re on today.
This journal has been an answer to prayers for me. It is an outlet for me and a source of connection to the people who have been begging to be let in, to love and support us.
I was afraid to let everyone in. I was afraid we would become a tragedy and people would feel sorry for us. But that is not at all what has happened. People have rallied around us, they have lifted us up, and they have become our village. God does answer our prayers if we listen. He is rejoicing in this new village and the strength that it provides for our family. Thank you for supporting us, for feeding us, and for loving us. By letting all of you in, I have been able to stop worrying about the small stuff as much, you are all taking care of that for me, and I have been able to enjoy my time with TJ and our family more. For this, I am forever grateful.
I love you little guy! Let your faith be bigger than your fears.